I prayed before I texted you…
Didn’t trust my tone.

I prayed before I texted you
Asked God what I should say to you
‘Cause every word I send to you
Either heals… or breaks in two
I prayed before I pressed “send”
Said, “Don’t let my pride pretend”
If love’s supposed to tell the truth —
Then tell it through me.

Phone screen glow in a darkened room
Typing fast, then I erase it soon
You said I don’t know how to stay
I know you right — I just don’t say

I talk strong when I feel small
Build up walls, then blame your call
You say “Why you go quiet?”
I say “I’m fine,” then start a riot

Not with fists, just with my silence
Weaponized that soft defiance
I don’t yell, I just withdraw
Make you guess what I just saw

I ain’t cheating, I ain’t wild
I’m just scared of being filed
Under “men who almost tried”
And loved with half their chest inside

I prayed before I texted you
Asked God what I should say to you
‘Cause every word I send to you
Either heals… or breaks in two
I prayed before I pressed “send”
Said, “Don’t let my pride pretend”
If love’s supposed to tell the truth —
Then tell it through me.

Thumb hovering, heart buffering
Memory rushing in
Arguments we never finished
Words I never let you win

You said, “You don’t fight for me”
I said, “I fight privately”
But love don’t count invisible
If you can’t visibly see it in me

I know scripture about patience
But I practice separation
When I feel too seen, I freeze
Turn conviction into ease

You deserve a steady voice
Not a maybe, not a choice
Not a “we’ll see how it goes”
When you asking where this goes

If I say “I love you” —
It gotta mean I stay.
If I say “I’m trying” —
It gotta show someday.

I prayed before I pressed “send”
Said, “Let this cycle end”
If love’s supposed to tell the truth —
Then let it start with me.

Start with me.