I keep it steady in the daylight
Measured tone, say the right lines
Shoulders square, jaw set tight
Everything look airtight

I don’t spill when it cut deep
I don’t fold when it run steep
I just breathe through the concrete
Tell myself it’s discipline

Built calm like a second skin
Wear it thin, never let it bend
Every room I’m stepping in
They expect me to handle it

So I handle it
Like I always do
Keep the edges smooth
Keep the center cool

If it shakes inside
I don’t let it move

I hold it together
Like it’s part of the job
Like the world don’t wobble
When I say that I’m fine

I hold it together
Every crack, every line
Keep it all aligned
Every time

I hold it together

I been gripping so long
My hands don’t unclench
Every thought feel strong
But the strength feel spent

I say I’m good
Like it’s muscle memory
Say I’m straight
Like it’s mandatory

But lately the quiet
Get louder than usual
And I don’t know how to—

—keep pretendin’ it’s neutral

I don’t know how to
Not brace for the fall
Don’t know how to
Let myself stall

I don’t know how to
Loosen at all

If I let it slip
If I let it show
Who am I without
All this self-control?

I hold it together
But it’s wearing me down
Every inch of composure
Is a weight I’ve found

I hold it together
But I’m losing the thread
If I drop this armor
What’s left instead?

I hold it—

I don’t want applause
I don’t want a crown
I just want to set it down
For a minute

I don’t want to be
The strong one now
I just want to feel it out
Without fixin’ it

I hold it together
But I’m tired of the role
Every wall I built
Got a toll

I hold it together
But I’m starting to see
If I never let go
It’ll bury me

I hold it together
I hold it together

I don’t know how not to.