I carried it for a long time
Never checked the label

I learned the words before I learned the meaning
Learned the posture, learned the tone
Folded hands, eyes closed
Like faith was something you just owned
Passed down with the last name
Taught young, never questioned
I wore it like a winter coat
Didn’t know how much it weighed

I didn’t doubt it
I just never chose it

This was borrowed belief
I held it carefully
Didn’t break it
Didn’t make it mine
This was borrowed belief
It kept me warm
But it never fit
The way I’m built inside

I watched strong people bend their knees
Watched them fall apart with grace
Watched them thank a God I couldn’t hear
Still wish me peace with the same face
I don’t think they were pretending
I just think we carry different weight
What steadies one man’s hands
Leaves another wide awake

This was borrowed belief
I held it honestly
Didn’t twist it
Didn’t lie
This was borrowed belief
And I don’t blame it
I just need to know
What survives

If faith is real
It can survive my questions
If it isn’t
Then silence tells the truth

This was borrowed belief
And I’m giving it back with respect
Keeping what still holds me
Letting go of what I can’t protect
I don’t need to replace it
I don’t need to be certain tonight
I just need what’s mine to carry
When the answers don’t arrive

Borrowed
But not wasted